Saturday, June 14, 2008

Scientist Award of the Week

Mayor Orders Dogs Released Into Forest
Reported by: Betsey Martin, KARK 4-News

Friday, Jun 13, 2008 @03:00pm CST

You've heard it before.....Arkansas animal shelters struggling to take care of unwanted dogs and cats. One mayor has decided the best way to fix the problem in his town is to set the animals free.
KARK visited the Helena-West Helena animal shelter back in January. Conditions were dirty and animals were in poor health.
Thursday, KARK learned the town's mayor James Valley has taken the unconventional approach of releasing the animals into the wild.
In a press release, the mayor says "we fed and watered them and took them to the St. Francis National Forest."

We're told about ten dogs, including several pit bulls were set free and that some of the dogs were sick.

Here is Wednesday's news release from Mayor Valley:
Ladies and Gentlemen:
This morning we began the process of dealing with our animal shelter problem. I have met, today, with Ms. Gloria Higginbotham. She is heading up a committee to create a county-wide animal shelter and perhaps with the participation of all governmental units, we can provide the kind of facility that will be deemed appropriate.
In the mean time, we are or have released all but a few our those animals heretofore housed at the sanitation shop. We fed and watered them and took them to the St. Francis National Forest and released them to freedom. We are disassembling the pens or fences and will not any longer house or keep any of these animals. This problem is dogging us and taking away from our ability to focus on the greater good for the community as a whole. One of our animal control officers has been to the hospital three times in as many months. Twice for bites and once for a severally sprain ankle growing out of incidents with these animals.
When Ms. Higginbotham's full plan is revealed, I plan to support it and assist her and the group in caring for our animals.
I just wanted to let you know.
James F. Valley

Ok, so you've got a sheltering problem. Who doesn't? Well, let's get rid of the animals, that'll solve it! Screw adoptions, screw pleas for help with local and national rescue groups, screw humane euthanasia as a last resort, how about just letting the dogs go. And I've got an even better idea- let them loose in a National Forest. (Which, oh, genius one, is illegal, as it states in another article about this subject And I'm just guessing that these domesticated dogs weren't fixed prior to release- any scientist who thinks that "letting them go" is the answer probably hasn't studied the birds and bees theory of reproduction lately. Which means the likelihood of reproduction is high. I can see it now: instead of taking steps to properly help citizens from dumping animals into the shelter to begin with, instead of taking steps to properly shut down the shelter if that's what needed to be done, this genius has instead created the breeding stock of Arkansas' next semi-feral dog colony.

themacinator hereby awards Mayor Valley the genius award of the week.