Tuesday, May 19, 2009

This Election Day, Vote NO on PDA

I was planning this blog in my head, when I found out it was election day. I feel it's even funnier now that I know. My typical cluelessness is charming, and serendipitous.

Really, I have a serious problem with PDA. I do not want to be subjected to people making out on the sidewalk, or in the park, or really, anywhere. When I'm at work in the shelter or in the field, or walking my dog, or eating a meal, I'm not really interested in seeing tongues that are visiting other mouths. Everyone has a tongue, and a mouth. Or at least, I think most people do, and I apologize for offending tongue/mouth challenged people. These tongues and mouths belong in their respective mouths when they are in public. I know I'm a prude, but I am not saying that tongues cannot visit other mouths when they are not on display on streets, sidewalks, buses, BART trains, etc.

Really, when people make out (or do other things I dare not mention here) in public, it makes me wonder why they are doing it. Are they swapping spit because they really love each other so much that they Just Can't Wait for a moment of privacy? Are they fondling each other in public because they're so desperately horny that they just don't care Who is Watching? Or, more likely, are they passionately embracing in an inappropriate location because they want Everyone To Notice? I'm going to go with option #3. When you're truly, madly, deeply in love, or lust, you think you're so beautiful, so gorgeous, such a truly awesome couple that of course everyone else would agree- and wants to share in your glory. They're missing out if they don't. So the corner will do. The bus stop, line in the grocery store, or other places where people can't get away, is even better.

I have always felt that the California Proposition system is deeply flawed, but maybe now it's time to use it for our advantage. If we can get enough anti-PDA signatures, we can get a proposition on the ballot. And where California goes, so does the rest of the country. Prudes, unite!

3 comments:

Valerie said...

LOL

Elizabeth Kennedy said...

I'm going to bring someone tomorrow night and sit in her lap all night. Right next to you. No matter where you move.

Elizabeth Kennedy said...

is this what you meant? http://dlisted.com/files/big-pictures_t_Paris_0.jpg