Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Vomit with a Side of Mango: Perks of Funemployment

I can't be a serious intellectual all the time while not working. I'm not getting paid, you know!

Today, Mac ate a mango pit. This was not a "bad dog" thing- this was a "bad owner" thing. I went outside to pull something out of our crawl space and left Mac unattended within striking range of the trash. As any self-respecting dog knows, the trash is a Very Important Item Worth Inspecting. Lately, Mac has been very good about staying out of the trash, at least when I'm quick about going in and out of the front door- he stands patiently waiting on the threshold of the door. So I gave him the benefit of the doubt. That was not a very smart move. I had cut up Mac's raw food this morning and the package was in there. When I came back into the kitchen after approximately a minute and a half, Mac was engrossed in the trash. He looked up at me and I saw the bright orange of mango slithering into his mouth. I went over to him, opened his mouth, and attempted to pull the mango out, only to watch the mango pit slither down his throat.

I pondered the situation. Mango pits are a very good shape to slither down throats, but not a very good shape to slither through intestines and out bung holes, at least as far as my imagination wanted to take that train of thought. Maybe, I thought, it was just a piece of mango skin. I dug through the trash. Twice. It was the pit. I called the vet, who called me back and had me bring him in. They put vomit-inducing drops in his eye and we waited about 5-10 minutes and Mac started looking a little woozy. Then up it came, along with some other junk. And over Mac went, to have at that mango pit (and the other stuff) a second time. I got him in time before that could happen. I don't think I've ever been so happy to see vomit, or a mango pit. I avoided the E-Vet, blockage and potentially surgery or worse, death. It was $80, but that's ok. And the whole vet's office clapped when he puked. How often do you get a round of applause for vomit?

Today also included a come-from-behind win by the A's, a complete game win by the Phillies, (both of which I listened to in full on the radio) and some shooting. My laptop busted yesterday, so I took it in today and had a relatively painless trip to the Genius Bar today, resulting in a good-as-new computer today. Not too bad! I have also almost completed my book about Disney, which I procured from the library, with my new LIBRARY CARD! Funemployment is fun. Very fun. What is this work thing again? And why do I have to do it!?